Do you know how hard it is to find a photo of red heads (or gingers if you must) with coloured streaks in their hair? Damn near impossible! Apparently red heads don't dye their hair. Sometimes I wish I was born a mousy brown so I could dye my hair different ways all the time. But no, I'm a red head and have impossible hair. It's hard to dye and style. I've tried and failed many times. When I was younger I made homemade dyes, which worked in all my friends' hair, but never in mine. I even tried bleaching it and it didn't change one iota. If I braided or put my hair in curlers over night, the waves and curls went flat my lunch. A few times I got a perm out of pure frustration. I looked like a poodle! Even then, the perm turned into frizzy hair within a couple of weeks. Just FYI, don't do something stupid like that a few weeks before your wedding. Trust me, it's a bad decision.
Usually when I get bored of the same old routine, I feel a need to do something to my hair. I don't know why that is exactly; probably because it's the easiest and most visible. Since I have so much trouble styling it, I often go and just get it all chopped off. My husband hates that! I don't know why husbands are always so possessive of their wife's hair. I guess he just doesn't want me to come home with a "mom" haircut. Which frankly, I don't either. Maybe that's why I went to the drugstore yesterday and bought a tube of purple hair dye. It's a total "anti-mom" hair style.
There were lots of different colours, but I chose purple. I have no idea what colour would look best because, as I said, red heads don't seem to dye their hair. I guess we are much too serious a people to be caught up in such silliness! It's really not that daring, it washes out in one wash. Ideally I'd like to find a few different colours that work and have a number of streaks going at the same time. I've tried the purple and I can kinda see it, but my hair is dark enough that the colour is fairly muted. Maybe subtle is a good thing, really. Yeah, sure, I'm getting a bit old to be doing stuff like this, but I don't feel old. Isn't it better to be silly now than wait until you're a grandparent and embarrass your children with such silliness? Wait, that's not a bad idea! Maybe I'll have two mid-life crisis!
Not a mommy blog; but I will talk about family. Not a food blog; but I will talk about my inability to cook. Not a diet blog; but I will complain about not fitting into my old jeans. Not a podium; but I will go on and on and on....
Thursday, July 5, 2012
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Pranks - Catching Santa In His Web Of Lies
The writing prompt for today is "pranks". What is the best prank you've ever pulled off? At first I thought I wouldn't be able to come up with anything. I don't pull pranks! That's ridonkulous! BUT, the more I thought about it, I came to realize that I've done more than my fair share in my youth. I would have just classified them as something else. So would my family, I'm sure. You say "prank", they say "cruising for a bruising". Potato, potato. OK, that actually doesn't make sense if you type it. Po Tato, Po Tate O. That's better.
So there has been a number of different pranks perpetrated by me in the past. When I was young I watched a dreadful movie with Fred Savage in it. He and some monsters would pull pranks and jokes on everyone. If Bill Murray regrets Garfield I'm sure Fred Savage regrets this one. As awful as it was I came up with some "A" list prank material. I personally liked the clothes peg on that pull-up shower thingy. (what the heck is that called?) Someone goes to turn the bathtub water on and BOOM! Sprayed in the head with the shower! I'm not sure why my dad automatically thought it was me. He does have a son, too.
Probably the one I remember most was the time I set a trap for Santa. I had serious doubts about this Santa character and was pretty sure he didn't exist. The year before I had found a gift in my parents closet and then later found the same gift under the tree. "From Santa". Uh huh. Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, I'll sent a trap and catch you in the act" Do not underestimate the patience of a seven year old. On Christmas Eve, once everyone had gone to bed I got to work. I strung skipping ropes across the upstairs hallway. I braced Christmas wrap tubing between my parents bedroom door frame. I topped it off by stringing packing tape, sticky side in, across their door as well. If anyone left that room during the night they would walk into a sticky mess. If only I had feathers!
Of course, if Santa did exist, no one would leave their room and risk ruining Christmas. If they did go out, well that would seal the truth that he didn't exist. They were leaving to sneaky sneak downstairs and put out the gifts! It was a perfect plan. Now I can only imagine the conundrum my parents faced when they eventually walked into that mess. If they came into my room to confront me they risked waking me up, proving my theory, and thereby ruining Christmas for everyone. OR, they could go on with their task and pretend it never happened. I couldn't possible get in trouble. I don't think they ever called me on that one; at least not when I was a kid anyways. I know they set the trap off, I was listening for it. I was totally OK with going along with the charade though, for the sake of my naive little brother.
I totally disproved all childhood holiday myths, sometimes painfully (re: Tooth Fairy), by the time I was in second or third grade. Except the Easter Bunny. I didn't bother with that one because it was obviously ludicrous.
So there has been a number of different pranks perpetrated by me in the past. When I was young I watched a dreadful movie with Fred Savage in it. He and some monsters would pull pranks and jokes on everyone. If Bill Murray regrets Garfield I'm sure Fred Savage regrets this one. As awful as it was I came up with some "A" list prank material. I personally liked the clothes peg on that pull-up shower thingy. (what the heck is that called?) Someone goes to turn the bathtub water on and BOOM! Sprayed in the head with the shower! I'm not sure why my dad automatically thought it was me. He does have a son, too.
Probably the one I remember most was the time I set a trap for Santa. I had serious doubts about this Santa character and was pretty sure he didn't exist. The year before I had found a gift in my parents closet and then later found the same gift under the tree. "From Santa". Uh huh. Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me twice, I'll sent a trap and catch you in the act" Do not underestimate the patience of a seven year old. On Christmas Eve, once everyone had gone to bed I got to work. I strung skipping ropes across the upstairs hallway. I braced Christmas wrap tubing between my parents bedroom door frame. I topped it off by stringing packing tape, sticky side in, across their door as well. If anyone left that room during the night they would walk into a sticky mess. If only I had feathers!
Of course, if Santa did exist, no one would leave their room and risk ruining Christmas. If they did go out, well that would seal the truth that he didn't exist. They were leaving to sneaky sneak downstairs and put out the gifts! It was a perfect plan. Now I can only imagine the conundrum my parents faced when they eventually walked into that mess. If they came into my room to confront me they risked waking me up, proving my theory, and thereby ruining Christmas for everyone. OR, they could go on with their task and pretend it never happened. I couldn't possible get in trouble. I don't think they ever called me on that one; at least not when I was a kid anyways. I know they set the trap off, I was listening for it. I was totally OK with going along with the charade though, for the sake of my naive little brother.
I totally disproved all childhood holiday myths, sometimes painfully (re: Tooth Fairy), by the time I was in second or third grade. Except the Easter Bunny. I didn't bother with that one because it was obviously ludicrous.
All Kid's Shows Should Include Jon Hamm
There are a lot of things right with how wrong this story is. Or rather, this story is wrong in all the right ways. Or something like that. Now you're probably looking at the photo to your left (no your OTHER left) and thinking, "Why do you have a photo of Jon Hamm?" Well, let me tell you a story about how a grown woman's decent into SAHM-ness is now complete.
After lunch Miss A and I decided to watch a little PBS. We had already done a few crafts that day, so Ididn't feel guilty thought she earned a little tv time. As long as it was educational, of course. As it turned out Martha Speaks was on, which is a cartoon that teaches new words and their meaning to preschoolers. The dog, Martha, eats some alphabet soup and can now speak. Hence the title. Sure why not? It's not like preschoolers are going to suddenly force Fido to eat can after can of alphabet soup, right? That's ridiculous; they'd never get the cans open.
So we're watching and I'm thinking, "Hey, the voice acting is pretty good! Actually, the writing is too. Weird." Kids shows are usually not known for their award winning writing and voice talents. Then I think to myself, "Hey, I recognize that voice! OMG, that's Jon Hamm!" Important to note, I actually say O.M.G. with a slight hint of valley girl. I'm not proud of this. So I watch the whole thing and it was awesome!
Seriously, is that not funny stuff? So that sad part of this is, and it's also the fantastic part, is I don't even watch Mad Men. I've never seen a single episode despite much goading from friends. I recognized his voice from Chris Hardwick's Nerdist podcast where Jon was a guest. He was super funny and geeky, and that's why I like him! So it's not "OMG you're Jon Hamm from Mad Men!" But, "OMG <insert valley voice> you're Jon Hamm from that podcast I heard once!" So yes, I got excited about a kid's show and started Googling the crap out of it. AND, I reaffirmed my geeky place in the world. Both of which were kinda wrong, but kinda right in all the best ways. Now if you'll excuse me I have another season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer to watch.
After lunch Miss A and I decided to watch a little PBS. We had already done a few crafts that day, so I
So we're watching and I'm thinking, "Hey, the voice acting is pretty good! Actually, the writing is too. Weird." Kids shows are usually not known for their award winning writing and voice talents. Then I think to myself, "Hey, I recognize that voice! OMG, that's Jon Hamm!" Important to note, I actually say O.M.G. with a slight hint of valley girl. I'm not proud of this. So I watch the whole thing and it was awesome!
Seriously, is that not funny stuff? So that sad part of this is, and it's also the fantastic part, is I don't even watch Mad Men. I've never seen a single episode despite much goading from friends. I recognized his voice from Chris Hardwick's Nerdist podcast where Jon was a guest. He was super funny and geeky, and that's why I like him! So it's not "OMG you're Jon Hamm from Mad Men!" But, "OMG <insert valley voice> you're Jon Hamm from that podcast I heard once!" So yes, I got excited about a kid's show and started Googling the crap out of it. AND, I reaffirmed my geeky place in the world. Both of which were kinda wrong, but kinda right in all the best ways. Now if you'll excuse me I have another season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer to watch.
Monday, July 2, 2012
Favorite Joke
I love jokes and it would be pretty hard to come up with just one favorite. Usually they involve funny voices, hand gestures and impersonations, so don't necessarily translate well written down. I remembered one from high school that I thought was pretty funny so I'll tell you that one.
A fighter pilot is flying over enemy lines when he is shot down and captured. He is badly injured and his captors are forced to amputate his leg.
He begs them, "Please! When you are flying over my home country during one of your raids, would you toss my leg out, so that a piece of me might rest at home?"
They agree to do this and when they next flew over his country they returned his leg. Later he had to have his other leg removed and he asked the same question of them. They agreed once again and returned his other leg to his home county. Yet again, the doctors discovered they had to amputate his arm! He asked them if they could do the same for his arm as his legs. This time they refused.
"Why not?" the pilot asked? "You have done this many times before!"
The commanding officer turned to him and replied, "We think you're trying to escape!"
And we all roll on the ground laughing! Well maybe not, but it could have been a lot worse!
A fighter pilot is flying over enemy lines when he is shot down and captured. He is badly injured and his captors are forced to amputate his leg.
He begs them, "Please! When you are flying over my home country during one of your raids, would you toss my leg out, so that a piece of me might rest at home?"
They agree to do this and when they next flew over his country they returned his leg. Later he had to have his other leg removed and he asked the same question of them. They agreed once again and returned his other leg to his home county. Yet again, the doctors discovered they had to amputate his arm! He asked them if they could do the same for his arm as his legs. This time they refused.
"Why not?" the pilot asked? "You have done this many times before!"
The commanding officer turned to him and replied, "We think you're trying to escape!"
And we all roll on the ground laughing! Well maybe not, but it could have been a lot worse!
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
NaBloPoMo - A Cure For Blog Neglect
I had been kicking myself lately because I hadn't been regularly posting anything to my blog. There was always something else more pressing to do. Cleaning, watching TV, Pintrest, Facebook...er, well, maybe there really wasn't anything that pressing actually. I guess the problem was I just wasn't making time for it. Even when I had a good topic and partially written it in my head, at the end of the day I just let it drop. I'll do it tomorrow, or the next day, but those days came and went and I wrote nothing. Writing for me was like jam. Jam yesterday, jam tomorrow, but never jam today. The only thing that got me writing was NaBloPoMo.
I thought that maybe I'd head over the BlogHer and check out the theme for July. I had never used the writing prompts before, but thought I might give it a try this time around. I was pleased to discover that the theme for this month was Kids. Great! I have kids, I even was one once. There should be a wealth of experiences to pull from. Most of the stories told around the family dinner table involve the poorly planned exploits and misadventures of parents, aunts, and uncles. I've heard these stories so many times that they practically write themselves!
The other benefit is that the writing prompts are posted ahead of time. I do have vacation time at some point this month. Ok, not so much a vacation but a change in location. With a view. I can write a head of time so that I don't miss a day or am forced to find a Wi-Fi connection in the woods. Ta Da! I really have no excuse this time. Well, except cleaning, TV, Pintrest, Facebook....
I thought that maybe I'd head over the BlogHer and check out the theme for July. I had never used the writing prompts before, but thought I might give it a try this time around. I was pleased to discover that the theme for this month was Kids. Great! I have kids, I even was one once. There should be a wealth of experiences to pull from. Most of the stories told around the family dinner table involve the poorly planned exploits and misadventures of parents, aunts, and uncles. I've heard these stories so many times that they practically write themselves!
The other benefit is that the writing prompts are posted ahead of time. I do have vacation time at some point this month. Ok, not so much a vacation but a change in location. With a view. I can write a head of time so that I don't miss a day or am forced to find a Wi-Fi connection in the woods. Ta Da! I really have no excuse this time. Well, except cleaning, TV, Pintrest, Facebook....
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Life is Like a Zebra
Something occurred to me the other day. Life is like a zebra. Now that sounds kind of cryptic, and it is, so I'll explain. We all have good days and bad days. Sometimes we might want to rename those "bad" days "challenging" days, because a part of us is totally aware it could be a lot worse. However, while we're in the thick of that can be hard to acknowledge. Whatever the case, those moments in time pass, as many have before, and we have a "good" day. With a certain amount of reflection we realize that we were able to get through the rough spots and they weren't all consuming as previously felt. We overcame and triumphed! Those "good" days, or perhaps even moments, are little islands of positivity. I love my home. I love my perfect kids. I love my life. We are at peace with our lives and our place in them. That's where the zebra comes in.
Depending on your perspective you can see a zebra as a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. How you choose to see the zebra has everything to do with your perspective. Neither is right nor wrong, but illustrates how perspective influences your experience of the same thing. Do you see white stripes or black? Good days come and go, and so do the bad ones. Which stripes do you see? Do you have a happy life with some bad days, or do you have an unhappy one with some good days thrown in? Choosing your perspective and what you focus on really changes how you define your life and the world around you. Do you choose to see good or choose to see bad? I think we all need to shift our focus and acknowledge that we have a much larger and more complex role in defining our own lives and happiness. The world we live in doesn't start outside ourselves, but from within.
Miss. A and I were playing with some tigers and zebras the other day. She sees a black horse with white stripes, I see a white horse with black stripes. Neither of us is wrong, just different. Maybe we can learn something from each other.
Depending on your perspective you can see a zebra as a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. How you choose to see the zebra has everything to do with your perspective. Neither is right nor wrong, but illustrates how perspective influences your experience of the same thing. Do you see white stripes or black? Good days come and go, and so do the bad ones. Which stripes do you see? Do you have a happy life with some bad days, or do you have an unhappy one with some good days thrown in? Choosing your perspective and what you focus on really changes how you define your life and the world around you. Do you choose to see good or choose to see bad? I think we all need to shift our focus and acknowledge that we have a much larger and more complex role in defining our own lives and happiness. The world we live in doesn't start outside ourselves, but from within.
Miss. A and I were playing with some tigers and zebras the other day. She sees a black horse with white stripes, I see a white horse with black stripes. Neither of us is wrong, just different. Maybe we can learn something from each other.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
VegChallenge Done. NEXT!
For the month of May I decided to challenge myself and eat vegan for a month. The reasons behind that decision were many and varied. I wanted to improve my health and diet. I'm not an unhealthy person by any means, but there's always room for improvement. Incorporating a more plant based diet into your own eating habits has a huge positive impact on your over all health. I wanted to see this first hand, eating vegan for a month would force me to experiment with foods that were entirely new to me. I also wanted to use it as a learning opportunity. For those that choose a vegan lifestyle what challenges do they face? Our society and culture is very single minded and I suspected there would be many roadblocks that would need to be overcome along the way. Lastly, I wanted a personal challenge and see it through. Not so much as a test of ability but of character. I, and anyone else, has the ability to eat vegan for a week or month or forever if they choose. What I wanted to know was would I, when no one was looking, cheat or cut corners? Like Plato's Ring of Gyges, what I did when no one was there was perhaps more important than the content of the test it's self.
The Internet is a wonderful thing! I found so many fantastic recipes online and I've collected my favorites in a binder. Yeah, I wrote them out in pen on actual paper. Occasionally people still use this medium. I also have a VCR. I use that too. What was really nice about last month was all the variety on the table. I ate lentils, black beans, black eyed peas, bok choy, spinach, and so many other things I don't normally eat. The food was full of colour and flavor. I also found that I didn't waste as much food as I thought I would. We all, at least from time to time, have a fridge full of healthy food that just sits there until it wilts and rots. I found that because I was relying on plants wholly, not just as filler or a side dish, nothing was going to waste. Also a large amount of food was dry, such as pasta, rice, beans, nuts and seeds. These things keep forever. Basically anyways. A lot of what I made was from scratch as well. Only a handful of ingredients and everything easy to pronounce. I made big batches and what I couldn't freeze I ate the next day for lunch. As long as I planned my meals ahead of time everything went smoothly. When I didn't, I paid for it. I learned leaving things to the last minute resulted in a very grouchy me! On a few of these occasions I had trail mix and popcorn for dinner.
Did I feel my health improved? I'd say "yes" for sure. Initially I had headaches and was very hungry, but by the second week that had passed. Normally by 2pm I was worn out and wanted a nap. By the second week I found I had more energy and wasn't tired in the after noons. Lately I also found that my hair and skin looked dull. I chalked it up to being tired and starting to look my age. I just looked and felt tired all the time. By the third week I found not only did I feel better, but I looked better too. Now I'm not one to give myself any sort of compliment, especially physical. I am pretty hard on myself most of the time. However, I found that my hair seemed shinier, my eyes brighter, and my skin had a healthy glow. I suspected that I'd feel better but I didn't think I'd look better. An unexpected but totally welcome benefit!
I found initially that it was difficult to find foods that had no animal products in them. There was a lot of label reading and wandering around looking lost. Eventually, especially when I found a few meals I liked, it was easier. Most of what I ate was fresh and homemade, not processed. That saved me a lot of time at the store. Eating away from home was probably the hardest. A lot of salads even include meat and dairy! You don't really realize this until you're trying to avoid these foods. They are EVERYWHERE! I can totally appreciate the need for vegan restaurants, bakeries and shops now. You totally take for granted being able to just sit down at a restaurant and order whatever you want without dissecting the menu. I also felt bad that I had to turn down food while visiting friends and family. I felt like I was insulting them. There's a lot of pressure to accept what's being offered because you don't want to seem rude or difficult. I imagine that this might cause some friction between friends and family and really test your commitment to veganism over the long run. Those who do decide that a vegan lifestyle is best for them don't do so lightly. There is a lot of pressure to undermine those efforts and it take a real commitment and hard work to maintain it.
Ultimately I DID manage to eat vegan for a month. I was pleased to see that I didn't cheat or take any short cuts. My family, especially my husband, kept me on the straight and narrow. I feel that I learned a lot and am much more conscious of what I put in my mouth. I feel more knowledgeable about food and what our bodies need to be, not just healthy, but thrive. I'm definitely going to ensure my diet is mostly plant based in the future because I see what positive changes occur when it is. That being said, my decision to eat more vegan like is more based on health than any ethical leanings. Vegans don't eat anything from an animal, but also avoid any products from an animal. No leather, wool, makeup, even some medicines tested on animals. It's an ethical stance to ban all animal sourced products from their lives. So when I say I was "vegan" for a month, I wasn't really. I feel like there really needs to be two different definitions. The "vegan" that chooses a plant based diet, and the "vegan" that chooses the whole lifestyle and accepts the ethics and morality behind it. They're so very different and not acknowledging that difference seems misleading.
Anyhow, I'm being told I'm typing too much so I'll stop now...
The Internet is a wonderful thing! I found so many fantastic recipes online and I've collected my favorites in a binder. Yeah, I wrote them out in pen on actual paper. Occasionally people still use this medium. I also have a VCR. I use that too. What was really nice about last month was all the variety on the table. I ate lentils, black beans, black eyed peas, bok choy, spinach, and so many other things I don't normally eat. The food was full of colour and flavor. I also found that I didn't waste as much food as I thought I would. We all, at least from time to time, have a fridge full of healthy food that just sits there until it wilts and rots. I found that because I was relying on plants wholly, not just as filler or a side dish, nothing was going to waste. Also a large amount of food was dry, such as pasta, rice, beans, nuts and seeds. These things keep forever. Basically anyways. A lot of what I made was from scratch as well. Only a handful of ingredients and everything easy to pronounce. I made big batches and what I couldn't freeze I ate the next day for lunch. As long as I planned my meals ahead of time everything went smoothly. When I didn't, I paid for it. I learned leaving things to the last minute resulted in a very grouchy me! On a few of these occasions I had trail mix and popcorn for dinner.
Did I feel my health improved? I'd say "yes" for sure. Initially I had headaches and was very hungry, but by the second week that had passed. Normally by 2pm I was worn out and wanted a nap. By the second week I found I had more energy and wasn't tired in the after noons. Lately I also found that my hair and skin looked dull. I chalked it up to being tired and starting to look my age. I just looked and felt tired all the time. By the third week I found not only did I feel better, but I looked better too. Now I'm not one to give myself any sort of compliment, especially physical. I am pretty hard on myself most of the time. However, I found that my hair seemed shinier, my eyes brighter, and my skin had a healthy glow. I suspected that I'd feel better but I didn't think I'd look better. An unexpected but totally welcome benefit!
I found initially that it was difficult to find foods that had no animal products in them. There was a lot of label reading and wandering around looking lost. Eventually, especially when I found a few meals I liked, it was easier. Most of what I ate was fresh and homemade, not processed. That saved me a lot of time at the store. Eating away from home was probably the hardest. A lot of salads even include meat and dairy! You don't really realize this until you're trying to avoid these foods. They are EVERYWHERE! I can totally appreciate the need for vegan restaurants, bakeries and shops now. You totally take for granted being able to just sit down at a restaurant and order whatever you want without dissecting the menu. I also felt bad that I had to turn down food while visiting friends and family. I felt like I was insulting them. There's a lot of pressure to accept what's being offered because you don't want to seem rude or difficult. I imagine that this might cause some friction between friends and family and really test your commitment to veganism over the long run. Those who do decide that a vegan lifestyle is best for them don't do so lightly. There is a lot of pressure to undermine those efforts and it take a real commitment and hard work to maintain it.
Ultimately I DID manage to eat vegan for a month. I was pleased to see that I didn't cheat or take any short cuts. My family, especially my husband, kept me on the straight and narrow. I feel that I learned a lot and am much more conscious of what I put in my mouth. I feel more knowledgeable about food and what our bodies need to be, not just healthy, but thrive. I'm definitely going to ensure my diet is mostly plant based in the future because I see what positive changes occur when it is. That being said, my decision to eat more vegan like is more based on health than any ethical leanings. Vegans don't eat anything from an animal, but also avoid any products from an animal. No leather, wool, makeup, even some medicines tested on animals. It's an ethical stance to ban all animal sourced products from their lives. So when I say I was "vegan" for a month, I wasn't really. I feel like there really needs to be two different definitions. The "vegan" that chooses a plant based diet, and the "vegan" that chooses the whole lifestyle and accepts the ethics and morality behind it. They're so very different and not acknowledging that difference seems misleading.
Anyhow, I'm being told I'm typing too much so I'll stop now...
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