All Days Should End Like This

Some days are just good days, no two ways about it. Whatever doubts you had yesterday are banished to the back of your mind along with your increasingly long "to do" list. Everything is put on hold while you live in that perfect moment. It's often a very difficult thing to do. To just live in the moment and enjoy it for what it is. It's something more people should consciously try to do; it does wonderful things for your well -being. A friend and I sat in the shade sipping lemonade while our kids played in the pool. They squealed with laughter as they chased each other, pouring buckets of water over each other's head. It was a hot day, but really I don't think they noticed. They were having way too much fun.

Later, while I was cleaning up after dinner, Baby K came in to see what I was up to. I was playing music while I tidied and she danced with a big smile on her face. She loves to dance! Miss. A joined us, and before I knew it, we were all dancing in the kitchen. If anyone looked in, they would have seen us dancing like wolves, the wind, and occasionally Miss A broke out her "cool moves". It was so much fun! In a way, I'm kind of thankful for all those trying times because it makes moments like that so much more rewarding. I didn't realize during those many, many, hours of rocking a colicky baby, that I would be later spinning and dipping a feisty four year old. It would have seemed so very far away, but was totally worth the wait.

Life is Like a Zebra

Something occurred to me the other day. Life is like a zebra. Now that sounds kind of cryptic, and it is, so I'll explain. We all have good days and bad days. Sometimes we might want to rename those "bad" days "challenging" days, because a part of us is totally aware it could be a lot worse. However, while we're in the thick of that can be hard to acknowledge. Whatever the case, those moments in time pass, as many have before, and we have a "good" day. With a certain amount of reflection we realize that we were able to get through the rough spots and they weren't all consuming as previously felt. We overcame and triumphed! Those "good" days, or perhaps even moments, are little islands of positivity. I love my home. I love my perfect kids. I love my life. We are at peace with our lives and our place in them. That's where the zebra comes in.

Depending on your perspective you can see a zebra as a white horse with black stripes, or a black horse with white stripes. How you choose to see the zebra has everything to do with your perspective. Neither is right nor wrong, but illustrates how perspective influences your experience of the same thing. Do you see white stripes or black? Good days come and go, and so do the bad ones. Which stripes do you see? Do you have a happy life with some bad days, or do you have an unhappy one with some good days thrown in? Choosing your perspective and what you focus on really changes how you define your life and the world around you. Do you choose to see good or choose to see bad? I think we all need to shift our focus and acknowledge that we have a much larger and more complex role in defining our own lives and happiness. The world we live in doesn't start outside ourselves, but from within.

Miss. A and I were playing with some tigers and zebras the other day. She sees a black horse with white stripes, I see a white horse with black stripes. Neither of us is wrong, just different. Maybe we can learn something from each other.

Sunny Days

Today I made two goals for myself and the girls. The first was to be more firm and no nonsense.  I'm the boss and what I say goes. There's been far too much whining, crying and disrespect going on in this house and I aimed to put my foot down.  The second was to get outside and enjoy the beautiful sunny day that was before us! As I had mentioned earlier, we have been sick pretty much since mid Decemeber. To say we had cabin fever would be an understaement. Today was a day where health and weather conisided and we were going to take full advantage of it!

The day started off as most lately have. Whining, begging, crying. "I want TV! I want Mario Kart", and a host of other unreasonable requests. Within the first hour Miss. A had about three time outs. During breakfast she moaned at what I imagined she thought was the most unfair treatment EVER! Really! Mothers can be so unreasonable at times! I told her she could eat or not eat, but she wasn't getting anything else until lunch. It was up to her. After a few minutes she stopped moaning and started eating. She looked up at me, "Mom can I tell you something?" I nodded. "I'm sorry I wasn't eating my food. And for crying. And for keeping everyone awake last night." She had been up and down more than a newborn demanding this and that. "It's hard being a little girl! I need more practice." I was pleasently shocked and amazed at this confession! "Thank you, that's very grown up of you. I'm proud of you for saying sorry." I suddenly had second thoughts about selling her to the circus.

After breakfast I told them that I was going to go upstairs and get dressed and ready for the day. Then we could all go out for a walk and maybe even the park. They were super excited about this because it meant the quartine was over! When I came down they had pulled out every bit of play food and made a tea party to surprise me with. After our "tea", we got dressed and went out for our walk. We looked at the little streams on the road from the melting snow and ice. Miss. A jumped in every one. We talked about how to cross the road safely and what the stop sign meant. Baby K talked and laughed to herself the whole time. When we got to the park we saw that there were lots of kids playing. The home daycares in the area all tend to congregate at this particular park. "Look at all the kids! Maybe I'll find the perfect friend here", Miss. A told me excitedly. Geez! Make me feel guilty for not taking her out much as I probably should.

We spent about two hours at the park. Miss. A played on the slides and the swings. Most of the other kids had left the park to go home for lunch, but we stayed and played a bit longer. Baby K loved watching it all. Her eyes were all lit up as she saw each new thing or person. Sadly she is not very good at walking in a snow suit. Quite often, for seemingly no reason, she would fall forward onto her face. It was like her head was some giant heavy bobble head or something! One moment she's fine, the next she's doing Downward Dog without the assistance of her hands. Ah well, I guess this is how we learn.

The best part, as far as Miss. A was concerned, was getting home just in time to have lunch with Daddy! They got to snuggle up on the couch together as lunch was being made. She's such a daddy's girl! It was a great day and hopefully tomorrow will be even better. I even managed to wash the floors today, so yay me!

Good Days

Today was a good day. I didn't win the lottery, magically lose 10lbs, or even cook something edible, but it was still good. The kids and I just hung out today enjoying our time together. My ideal plan of spending quality individual time with each, and then some group activities we could all do together, seems to be working out. Baby K and I danced and sung together, played with her tea set and read some books. Miss. A and I made a bird feeder which we hung in the back yard, made popcorn and watched a movie together, and did some puzzles. When we weren't doing things together, the girls did some colouring, watched Classical Baby (cartoon babies and animals dancing to classical music), or just chased each other around playing tag or hide and go seek. They didn't seem to mind playing on their own while I got chores done around the house. The house is starting to look more like a home and less like a college dorm. We ended the day with both the girls splashing in the bath tub. Like I said, nothing miraculous, just and really nice day where everyone seemed to enjoy themselves. Even Scott received kudos at work today! Which is always nice when you start a new job. Now I have the house to myself so I'm going to try out that new Zumba game I got for my birthday. I hope I can get the blinds to go down. I don't want to frighten the neighbours with my tired old dance moves. I bet Betty White is a better dancer than I am.

Deep Breath. Start Again

Today's start was such a tease. Miss. A woke at seven, and Baby K slept in until eight. Woot! I was allowed that most coveted of experiences the morning shower! Not having to wait until naptime or night is a rare but welcome treat. Before eight in the morning I was showered, dressed, looking and feeling human again. Today was going well! It was going to be awesome! Somewhere the universe was quietly laughing at me. It rapidly went down hill from there. I won't bore you with the details. It would take too long and eventually you would lose focus and start thinking about other things. Let's just say it ended at the park with two little girls competing to see who could throw the biggest tantrum.

Amongst the sand, tears and runny noses I started to feel a little sorry for myself. Some days seem to go so well and others are so hard. That's probably when I take to the internets in search of sympathy and solidarity. Otherwise I would probably stand in the middle of the living room and shout "YOU'RE ALL DRIVING ME CRAZY!!" Which I think we can all agree is not the most mature and motherly thing to do. Honest, yes. Probably the most honest, but not the best. Quite often the internets don't disappoint. Often a few people have been in the same boat and post words of encouragement. Sometimes, when maybe I've been complaining a tad too much, they thankfully post nothing at all. Any responses would have to be along the lines of "suck it up princess". Which, ultimately you have to do. Stay calm and carry on.

Though, in those stressful moments (days, weeks...), I feel somewhat overwhelmed, later I calm and put it all in perspective. I have a good family and support system. My kids, though trying like any others, are good kids. I might be having a bad day, but there are others out there facing hardships every day. Many are not as fortunate as me. I don't have to worry about food, doing it on my own, health problems, and so many other things that seem to define the lives of other people. It isn't always easy, but nothing worth doing is. I wish I would remember that and have it at the front of my consciousness always. If I did, maybe the "hard" days wouldn't really seem that hard and I could just enjoy what I have every moment. Tomorrow is another day.

Deep Breath. Start Again.