Out With The Old, Ban on the New

I was invited to a cleaning party this weekend. No, it's not a party where we all clean someone's house; though I would like to host one of those if I could get anyone to attend. This was a house party where the hostess had someone come and talk about chemical free cleaning products. She gave a lengthy demonstration, answered many questions, and then later those interested were able to purchase what they were interested in. I've never been to a hostess party like that before. It was over three hours long. I came away with two conclusions. The first, my attention span lasts only about an hour and a half, and that's with really trying. The second, my house is disgusting!

This revelation wasn't brought on because of the demonstration that was presented. That's their job; to create a need and provide a solution for it. It was more from the discussion between those attending. It seems that everyone works very hard to have a spotless, bacteria free, smug free home. They gossiped about the difficulties getting this and that clean. How they toil for hours cleaning in between the grout lines on the kitchen floor. They compared notes about the hardships of soap scum and sticky finger prints on stainless steel appliances. There were things they diligently worked endlessly to keep clean that I've never even touched.

There was a time when I would get down on my hands and knees and clean with a scrub brush. I would scrub the floor clean. Those days have come and gone. Those attending the party, I suspect, are not the norm. That being said, I'm way on the other side of the spectrum. There are piles all over the house of random things. Things that need to be sorted. Things that have been sorted but just need a home. Things I plan to donate to charity, but just haven't found the time to drop them off. Things that need to be organized first before other things can be cleaned and put away. Most of the clutter and mess are various projects that have been started and interrupted. Eventually they are abandoned all together because something more pressing has demanded my attention. This home's biggest enemy is clutter! It's the clutter that prevents any really cleaning from happening. It also stresses me out in a huge way. I'm getting rid of it once and for all and it's not coming back.

If it hasn't moved in months we don't need it. Everything is going in garbage bags. Things that can be tossed out are being heaved out of the house asap. Those that can be donated will be. I'm going to throw all those bags, and there are a lot, in the back of the car and head for the nearest Sally Ann. The biggest thing is the community garage sale usually held in May. We are going to have SO MUCH to sell. It's going to be massive! I'm going to start organizing for it now. I look around now and think "hmmm, I wonder if this is how hoarding looks at the start." Not that we hoard anything, but I know I always think that we or someone else might need it. There's nothing wrong with anything we have, we just have too much, so I can't bring myself to just throw it out. A cluttered home makes for a cluttered mind, at least in my case. If I want any peace of mind at all, I have to empty this house asap! This is Spring Cleaning to the extreme. I wouldn't be surprised if that's already a TLC show.

I'm Zen With That

In truth I'm not, but I'd like to be. Or rather, I like the idea of it. Whatever "it" is. The "zen" part I mean. I assume it means to accept and be at peace with what's around you. I'd like to imagine that's what it means. I could look it up, but I might find I'm disappointed with the actual definition. My definition has, as Stephen Colbert says, a truthiness about it. It may in fact be wrong, but facts are over rated. Besides, I doubt the world's most important endeavours were ever attempted with all the facts in place first.

I have a very hard time just going with the flow of things. My immediate reaction when things are not going as planned is to become incredibly frustrated. I really wish I was one of those people who could react to things with ease and grace. I am NOT a graceful person no matter how you try to adjust and mold the word to fit. It will never apply to me. If I'm not knocking something over and bumping into something, I'm saying something awkward. If I'm not putting my foot in my mouth, I'm either under reacting to something or, more likely than not, over reacting. I seem to live in a world of "whys" and "what ifs", but never in the moment. Very rarely do I enjoy where I am at the time. Instead I try to control where I am and try to anticipate what's next. You know that annoying person who is clearly not listening but just waiting for their turn to talk? Well that's me, but apply that to my whole life. I annoy me. Some days I just wish I would just get out of my own way and live life in the moment.

The only thing I can think of that might help is more time to reflect. When I think about it, I rarely just sit down and have a few moments thought to myself. Every minute is full with doing something, making plans, or worrying that I don't have a plan yet in place. Even if I'm just sitting there, seemingly doing nothing, I'm thinking and scheming and plotting. OK, that's a little dramatic, but I felt I needed to inject a little excitement in there. I'm sure on some level there is some plotting going one somewhere. I used to at least reflect on what I was thankful for at the end of every day, but strangely I've stopped doing that. I don't know why. I guess I just forgot to do it. Isn't that awful? To forget something so important? I think perhaps, against every instinct in my body, I'm going to have to get up early and find my center in the morning. Maybe a little yoga and some peace and quiet to myself before the rush of the day. A little self reflection, a reminder of what is right and important, and start every day off on a positive note. It sounds like a plan! Oh shoot, there I go again!