Today's start was such a tease. Miss. A woke at seven, and Baby K slept in until eight. Woot! I was allowed that most coveted of experiences the morning shower! Not having to wait until naptime or night is a rare but welcome treat. Before eight in the morning I was showered, dressed, looking and feeling human again. Today was going well! It was going to be awesome! Somewhere the universe was quietly laughing at me. It rapidly went down hill from there. I won't bore you with the details. It would take too long and eventually you would lose focus and start thinking about other things. Let's just say it ended at the park with two little girls competing to see who could throw the biggest tantrum.
Amongst the sand, tears and runny noses I started to feel a little sorry for myself. Some days seem to go so well and others are so hard. That's probably when I take to the internets in search of sympathy and solidarity. Otherwise I would probably stand in the middle of the living room and shout "YOU'RE ALL DRIVING ME CRAZY!!" Which I think we can all agree is not the most mature and motherly thing to do. Honest, yes. Probably the most honest, but not the best. Quite often the internets don't disappoint. Often a few people have been in the same boat and post words of encouragement. Sometimes, when maybe I've been complaining a tad too much, they thankfully post nothing at all. Any responses would have to be along the lines of "suck it up princess". Which, ultimately you have to do. Stay calm and carry on.
Though, in those stressful moments (days, weeks...), I feel somewhat overwhelmed, later I calm and put it all in perspective. I have a good family and support system. My kids, though trying like any others, are good kids. I might be having a bad day, but there are others out there facing hardships every day. Many are not as fortunate as me. I don't have to worry about food, doing it on my own, health problems, and so many other things that seem to define the lives of other people. It isn't always easy, but nothing worth doing is. I wish I would remember that and have it at the front of my consciousness always. If I did, maybe the "hard" days wouldn't really seem that hard and I could just enjoy what I have every moment. Tomorrow is another day.
Deep Breath. Start Again.