The doctor has recently diagnosed me with a chronic condition: Children. Symptoms include restlessness, weight gain, irritability, difficulty sleeping, fatigue among many others. It is an increasingly debilitating condition to which there is no known cure. Thousands of Canadians suffer with the effects of Children on a daily basis. Symptoms can be managed; coffee, wine, chocolate and spa retreats may have an elevating effect. Other side effects of children included, but are not limited to: joy, pride, love, awe, hope and wonder.